It’s the Little things

For those of you who do not know, Bigs & Littles are like a mentor/mentee pairing that often takes place in organizations like sororities and fraternities and such. In Marching Chiefs, we have Bigs and Littles. Since my Pieces (clarinet) section has a wide array of males and females, my Little is a male. I chose to take a male as my Little because I am also in a sorority, and I plan to take a Little in that organization in the future, and having two female Littles in two organizations might pose as a problem in the future.

So here’s how it happened:

I go into preseason training having told all of my second year class that I wanted a guy as my little, and they all supported me. Granted, there aren’t many men in the Pieces section, and there were only a few guy rookies auditioning for Chiefs. I was looking at all of the rookie males and two kind of “stood out” to me. But one in particular was like “he looks cool, I wonder what he’s like”. He stood up to introduce himself the first night we all met and I immediately said to the girl next to me “Him. I want him as my little”. She told me that it was way too soon to know that, and I just laughed, because I could just feel it.

Later that evening we all went to Zaxby’s, and I magically ended up in line behind him. We talked a little bit, and he mentioned that he like twenty one pilots and basketball and he was a transfer from USF. He was easily the coolest person I had ever met in my entire life. So naturally, I called dibs. I went around the room to those taking littles and said “I want Charlie”. I even posted it on the Pieces page later in the week.

I kept checking in on rookie training to see how he was doing, because he couldn’t be my Little if he got cut. Thankfully he was doing well, and he made block! Which was awesome. I actually searched for his name on the blocklist before my own name. After the blocklist was posted, we interacted even more, and some people asked us if we knew each other from high school. We were getting along so well, it was like we had known each other for forever.

The day came and I was assigned my little, and it was Charlie Mulloy and my heart filled with joy. I instantly grew worried though. “What if he doesn’t want me, or he doesn’t like me, or I annoy him?” I started thinking about the little things like how the reveal would go, if we would hug or just high five, if he would be happy or even remotely excited.

It turns out that he didn’t even know that we had Bigs and Littles in Pieces, so he was very surprised to say the least. He mentioned that he was wondering why I was being so nice to him, and it was obviously because I was his Big, and he was my Little.

We’ve had a connection, a bond, a tie that I just can’t explain. He brings such joy and happiness to my life, and my face lights up every time he walks into a room. Sometimes I find myself getting insecure though. Like I’m giving affection and he’s just sort of accepting it like “this chick is weird”. But I guess he’ll understand soon enough when he has a Little of his own.

He has a girlfriend, who’s absolutely stunning in all areas. She’s beautiful, talented, and so funny and kind. Their relationship is actually “goals” and they’ve been dating a year now. I don’t know how she feels about me. Quite frankly, if I was in her position, I probably wouldn’t like me either. I mean here I am, this girl, showing utter and complete affection to this boy. And here I am telling all you people this. Why? Because I kind of want it out there? I don’t know. I look at Charlie as an extended version of me. But an extended version of myself that I wish I could be. It’s hard to explain.

I’ve had dozens of people approach me and ask me if I’m interested in my Little. The answer is no. I like to think that he’s my best friend. Does he think of me that way? Probably not. And that’s okay. My job isn’t to be his best friend, it’s to mentor him and make sure he’s doing okay and surviving Chiefs, and I think I’ve done a pretty good job of that.

So to clarify, we are not a couple. We’re just a couple of goofs who get along really well. I probably won’t end up posting this, and if I do, I’ll probably take it down immediately. So if you’re reading this, congratulations.

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